For anyone who has done IVF, I would love your thoughts.
We are amazed to have made it this far, and if we're lucky enough to have a successful retrieval/fertilization....we will have a new struggle to deal with: How many embryos do we transfer?
My clinic pretty much only does 5-day transfers, since they can weed out the highest quality ones. So..please bear that in mind. (If we did a 3-day, I'd transfer 2)
I am terrified of twins. Terrified. I have that blood issue, and I worry that two babies won't get enough blood. I know there are lots of health risks to me and esp the babies with twins in utero. Psychologically, I don't think we could handle twins. We have no family nearby, and just a few friends. (And they have their hands full with babies already). Financially, we definitely can't handle twins. We make modest incomes, but in the Bay Area, that only pays for mortgage. Daycare for twins would run about $2800-$3,000 a month. Neither of us can afford to quit, either, as we both need to stay in the workforce right now.
Now, on the other hand... I am terrified of having come this far in our journey, and losing it all. If we transfer 1, and freeze the rest, none of the embryos could survive freezing. if that one doesn't take, we're SOL. This whole journey over, where it could have been successful. I would be devastated, always wondering "what if I had transferred two? Wouldn't two be better than none?"
Women in my family get pregnant on the first try. How I got to IVF is a mystery, perhaps it was bad doctors, cysts, and bad sperm. I do worry that all things being equal, implanting two good embryos into my uterus will both implant.
I've spoken with coworkers about this, both of whom did IVF. They all recommend transferring 2 high grade 5-day blasts. GULP. One of them transferred one, got pregnant with one. On the second IVF (for child #2), they transferred 2 5-day blasts, and only one took.
My other friend transferred 2, and she thinks both stuck. After a few weeks, she had some clotting, and thinks that was the twin. She ended up with one healthy, beautiful baby girl.
It is a crapshoot. I'm probably damned if I do, damned if I don't. Any advice? I'm especially curious to hear from those of you under 35, who had 5-day transfers. (All advice welcomed, of course)
I go back and forth. One, two, one, two. I keep reading these horror stories about 10x higher rate of infant mortality with twins, 6x higher cerebral palsy, etc. And I FREAK OUT. But then I realize there are so many twins I know that are perfectly healthy! So is it just scare tactics?
If I have a truly high grade, high quality blastocyst, isn't it wise to just transfer that one?
PS - My ovaries burn like fire today. It feels like they are popping. Here's hoping they aren't ovulating already! Is this normal towards the last day of stimming?
Friday, July 24, 2009
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5 comments:
We did a 3 day transfer and only transferred one, because, like you, we were terrified of twins. Our doctor only recommended one because I was 31 and "healthy" (ahem, 14 tries later). And, now we have our beautiful one year old.
Fast forward... we just transferred 2 3-day embryos into my partner (last week, fingers crossed) with much hemming and hawing. FET rates aren't as high as IVF rates. I'm scared sh*tless. I'll let you know how that turns out.
As for your ovaries - no woman is supposed to grow that many eggs at once. They are overstimulated. Be sure to plan in some rest/recovery time as they deflate.
BEST BEST of luck to you.
we too were scared of twins and in the end transferred the only 2 that split properly after 3 days and thankfully only 1 stuck around. ideally we would have loved a 5 day trasfer but our embryologist said our embryos may not have survived to day 5 and they had a better chance in the natural environment of the uterus. your clinic may prefer transferring at 5 days, i can't imagine there are any that don't but hopefully they will transfer at 3 if yours don't look like they will make it to 5 like what happened to us. we have a beautiful 5 month old to show for our 3 day transfer and likely would have had nothing if we had waited until 5 like our RE would have preferred...
we were willing to take whatever comes. Singleton, twins etc. Each transfer we did 2 5-day embroys. 5 tries later we transfered 1 and that was the 1 that stuck.
I'd say go for at least 2.
last fall, we transferred 2 5-day embryos. one stuck (and then i miscarried). this spring, we did a FET - we thawed 4 embryos, 3 survived the thaw and were transferred. we are now pregnant with a singleton.
i dont know what to say re: advice though...its a total crapshoot. you could have none or all of the ones you transfer stick - heck, you could even end up with more than you transfer if an embryo splits in utero. as controlled as ivf is, there is still a lot of unknown.
do what feels comfortable to you at decision-making time. wishing you the BEST of luck!
OK, so even though I'm not under 35, my eggs are 31, so I am going to chime in. We hemmed and hawed about one or two. At the end of it, as you know we transferred two...and got twins. Now, I am terrified of twins as well, but after almost 10 weeks I'm much less terrified than I was when I found out.
I vote for two especially as this is your 'one shot'. But in the end, you have to do what you feel is right.
You may not even know what that decision is until they show you the embryos right before your transfer. We didn't. Then, we said, OK, put in two!
Best of Luck!!
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