Here's one for you:
1. I had a terrible migraine all day today.
2. My brother in law is getting deployed to Iraq.
3. Becky's sister passed away on Monday.
4. Becky has to miss her own baby shower.
We all saw it coming with her sister. Sadly, she's been addicted to drugs, severely anorexic, etc for decades. She almost died last year from a heart attack, and since then she's been a vegetable. She passed on Monday, and B flew out to MN Tuesday to help with preparations. She's still out there now.
The funeral is Friday, which would have worked out well (since the shower is Saturday). I found an early flight back Saturday morning, so she could attend her shower. It doesn't look like B's going to come back until a day or two later. I'm trying to be supportive and not push her buttons on it. I know she's dealing with a lot out there. I just can't help but feel bad. We had such a shitty two years, nothing to ever celebrate or be happy about. And now we finally have a few opportunities for OUR little family to celebrate happy things. And she won't be there for it. :(
I am so terrible. I'm hormonal and something leaked out during our chat today. "Well I dont expect you to be at the birth either. I'm sure some other thing will happen in your family and you'll have to miss our special day." Oops. Ugh. I was crying and hormonal and exhausted from this week. It slipped out, I swear. I just hate to see us robbed of sharing a happy moment together, after such a long painful journey.
Oh well. Sometimes life is shitty. I just need to accept that and get over it. (And yes, I'm ashamed to even think about myself/my wishes right now...that's why I'm trying to just shut my piehole and support whatever she decides is right)
==== Update===
So 30 seconds after I wrote that post, B called me back. She said she booked a flight out for Saturday morning. She may have to cancel it, but she's hoping to make it in time for the shower. Of course me being preggo and full of hormones, I started crying and I apologized for what I'd said, and that I felt so bad for saying anything at all, and it was wrong of me to add to her stress, and I should have been quiet, etc... I think she realized I was hormonal and told me it's ok and not to feel bad...and that she also agrees that she shouldn't miss big events in our little family's life. I just hope she's able to keep her flight! Man helluva night.
Wednesday, January 27, 2010
You know how bad things happen in clusters?
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9 comments:
Big hugs and its ok to be selfish right now. When you are pregnant things change and they change once again when the little one is born. Hugs to you both and I am so sorry for your loss.
I bet the baby shower will be amazing and Im rooting for you two and hope she makes it!
What a rough time, indeed. I'm glad she'll (probably) be back for the shower. I do think it's important for her to be there. But I'm sorry for everything. *hugs*
Wow, that really does suck-- I am sorry you & B are going through all of this.
I hope she's able to make it, but if not, try to soak up all the love & warmth for both of you & enjoy.
I'm sorry to hear things are sucking so badly. It's good that B's so understanding. :)
so sory for your loss. that's awful. and awful timing. i hope you two can find ways to support each other - that's prob the best that anyone can do in a time like this. any possible way to reschedule the shower? guess that would be tricky. oy. you are both in my thoughts.
You both have gone through so much and I am glad that you both put the little one first. The little girl is very luck to have her mommies!!!
I'm so sorry for what y'all are going through right now. I hope she is able to make if for the shower! And you're not being selfish at all for wanting that. {{{hugs)))
Sending you all love.
Ugh, what a lot of stress. Sorry to B for the loss of her sister.
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