Not a bad tradeoff for a BFN. Yes my friends, the RE called just now to confirm I'm definitely, absolutely, certainly, and 100% not pregnant.
I'm fine. My grieving process for BFN's is generally the day I get my IUI. Each time, the donor count has been so low. 4mm with this last batch. Just too low to have hope. For some people, the BFN hurts the most. I guess for me, I get a feeling earlier on and come to terms with it before the actual BFN. That helps me not crash too hard after the TWW.
The hope I have is that I'm taking a month off to get another shg, and see if they can treat all the cysts and polyp-like growths I'm experiencing. Another ray of hope is that we'll get a new donor. Maybe this time with better counts, so I will actually have a real chance. The last hope is that I will now be asking for two IUIs per cycle, and I will dictate the times - not my RE. I've learned that the only advocate for my TTC journey is me.
We are setting up consultations with two additional fertility clinics: Nova IVF and Portola Valley Women's Health. I want to learn their style, express my pains with current RE, and see if their style offers more individualized monitoring and treatment. If so, we will seriously consider switching.
And now for the lighter side. We leave for SoCal tomorrow morning (with the dog in tow, of course). I'm taking Becky to Geisha House restaurant in Hollywood, which has the best sushi and sake you've ever tasted.
AND....(Shawn!).....I can finally have that beer in my fridge. All of us TTC should lift our glasses on Labor Day. I guess it's our Anti Labor Day. But cheers to everyone who's been through labor recently, those who are soon going through labor, and to the rest of us who are praying to experience labor someday. :) Cheers!
Wednesday, August 27, 2008
Looks like Sushi & Sake for me tomorrow.
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11 comments:
Bummer on the BFN!
I think it is smart to look at your other options. And it WILL happen for you!!
Well, I'm sorry. Really sorry. If you are switching donors, I have heard good things about The Sperm Bank of California. They will tell you over the phone who has the highest counts (like if you narrow it down to 3 or something), etc. I'm not using them, but we seriously considered it. Just happened to find our fave donor somewhere else .... but thought I'd pass on the tip. Lots of women love them. Very lesbo-friendly, too.
I'm glad you're educating yourselves and advocating for what YOU want and need. I hope you have fun in SoCal. SUSHI! yum
Glad that you're keeping your options open and considering a new RE. I hope you and Becky find one that treats you as well as you deserve to be treated.
And FYI, I would recommend Xytex sperm bank. I personally know of three people who've gotten pregnant using their donors (myself included). They have great customer service and have been very patient about answering my numerous questions. They also offer a lot to open-identity donors, if you're interested.
Hugs to you and Becky!
I will lift a beer to you. Have fun in CA. ♥
i really DON'T want to experience labor! i want a kid, though.
damn BFN.
but YAY beer!
what's with all the vacations??? i'm coming to live with you guys!
i think you should get some of our donor at ccb and then our kids can be half sibs! haha
wait, what am i talking about? i've never even met you!!!
ok. i'm going to cuddle with lani and watch that grizzly man documentary about the guy and the bears.
seriously - that's my life.
look. we are gonna have babies. we are.
i'm sending you and becky lot of hugs...(and the dog)
xoxoxoxoxo
Mmmm, sushi. Good luck with shopping around, it does sound liek a good plan!
Sorry about the BFN. I waved to you on Monday as we drove through what I assume to be your locale. It's good to try something different. I hope it works for you like it did for me!
I'm so sorry about the BFN. Enjoy southern california, and have more than one beer!
So sorry about the BFN! My last tww, I really looked forward to sushi and beer too. I 'celebrated' that BFN with a couple of pints at our monthly knitter's pub night, which was probably a really bad idea, because I shortly afterwards burst into tears.
I'm sorry, too.
"I've learned that the only advocate for my TTC journey is me"
but I'm very glad you think this way. If we kept listening to the doctor instead of our own intuition, we wouldn't be where we are now.
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